I periodically try to be good. I give up my favorite boys. I stow away all my sexual overflow or redirect it toward places closer to home. I try and inevitably fail.
The fact is, I am 34-years old. I cannot always have this fuck-filled life. It cannot last forever. Someday, heads will not turn when I walk into a room. I know that day is coming. I try to prepare. And then I have an opportunity that re-sparks my naughty ways and I realize that I should also accept who I am. I am a woman who loves men: naked, hard, ready men. I want to touch, taste and fuck as many of them as possible.
I’d rather not end this saga divorced but I should stop denying who I am because it only makes me crazed. No one is happy with me.
I’m sex addict. Which one of you is my next drug?
From devoted girlfriend to loving wife. From nagging spouse to mother of his child. From disenchanted woman to a glorfied mistress. These are my stories of elicit rendevous, stolen moments, slippery encounters and sex and sex and sex. I am a mistress, an adulterer, someone's lover and secret.
About Me
- Forever Mistress
- Forever looking for that next great ....
12 comments:
I am!
I know this trepidation all too well. That "someday" of which you speak is inevitable. I fear I won't be able to cope.
Nice to see you again, by the way. :)
I 2nd the nice to see you again comment. And as I recently said to Ms. I here, there has to be a 12step program for women like us. Then again we'd probably be fucking some guy there during the coffee breaks.
XX
I wouldn't be too sure of that age thing! There are any number of beautiful, sexy women well into their 40's and even 50's -- *gasp*!
Outward beauty and sex appeal truly does come from the inside - from confidence, emotional and mental stability, self-assurance and self-awareness, and so on. You can be sexy and desirable for a very long time indeed!
Just don't stop being true to yourself.
I'm glad to see you're back!
I had some brief moments with a therapist. I noticed that I even flirted with him! It's a question of happy with who I am vs. unhappy trying to figure it out. I vacillate between the two. I'm hoping one will be more prominent than the other. So far, it's the slutty one.
It's great having you back!
Hello again, nice to hear from you.
I'm as torn as you are, but I'm making progress myself.
I'll keep reading...
There IS an organization for people like us. It's called SAA and here is the web address: http://www.saa-recovery.org/
Seriously, having been where you are, you will need this organization eventually. Good luck and, as a recovering addict, I still enjoy the guilty pleasure of your blog.
Please put me at the front of the list. :)
Embrace that which you want. Don't worry about the "while I can". I suspect that anyone who can turn heads as you describe, will always be able to do so.
Best regards,
B
I know the feeling of trying to be good from time to time, but always coming back to where I was - sometimes i just think - fuck it, why bother trying to be good?
I think all of us who are excited by booty calls or a little "on the side" wrestle with the guilt of breaking trust and faith. If you don't want to be "good" then you won't bother trying. You have to WANT to change the behavior or it, quite simply, won't. Believe me, I know.
I offer my services and cock for your pleasure.
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