I'm a lucky girl. I've had some great lovers. It's been a smooth, wet transition into this lifestyle. It's easy to enjoy the lover who worships your body, begs for your mouth and cums with a shudder and a gasp.
Lately, my luck has not been so good. My brown-eyed Irish boy could care less if he ever saw me again. Occassionally he'll e-mail, tell me he misses my pussy. I just stopped writing back.
My long-distance lover pulled the curtain on our meeting the day before I boarded a plane. While he had a valid excuse, I can't help but feel like the dupe. Was he as in to me as I am into him? I guess I'll never know.
And then there's the boy I'm seeing now. Eager, voracious appetite, works close by but is never satisfied. Now before you open your mouth in surprise, I always leave my man satisfied. But this man isn't happy with just me. He wants to try something new, exciting, different every time. Let's add a guy, he suggests. Or maybe a girl. What about double penetration? We could swing with another couple.
All of those are exciting, fun things I'm eager to have, but not on my lunch hour when I have a lovely planning meeting at 1. He never seems happy to just meet me for some quick but thorough sex at the local park. I feel like I'm failing before we even start.
The pragmatic me shakes her head, and reminds me that I should be thankful to have these chances at all. To be thankful that men look at my freckled nose and looping curls and want to bury their hands between my thighs. But there's that other little voice, the one that wants something more. Something that I haven't had for a while.
I am a sure thing, but I still want to be seduced. Maybe it's time to look for someone else again.
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9 comments:
You're right, you are lucky.
So many men to choose from with no end in sight (unless you'd like to show us your "end").
Whatever will you do?
Try them all, fuck to your hearts content. Be the slut, the whore, the fuck you want to be. Why not?
Go get'em but be sure to tell.... Those of us still searching depend on your shining beacon of temptation to light the way.
There is such a fine line between enough attention, and too much, eh. How can we discern what our mistress needs? I'm sure there are clues, feedback aplenty. Today you need to get what you need and move on. Maybe the same tomorrow. Then there will be a day for deeper needs, for those rarer interests that are so strong.
Do you think it's just ridiculously selfish to send the one I have away just so I can find someone new? Someone who might actually enjoy fucking me instead of trying to make it a group event every time?
Yeah, it's selfish.
Selfish? Maybe, but isn't that the point? A group event dilutes the personal attention you need. You want HIS attention.
Selfish? Perhaps but I believe you must start with two, make the most of the two of you, then explore your more non-traditional desires if you have them.
Focusing on yourself only would be considered masturbation. Focusing on the two of you (whoever you may be with) is hot fucking lust. Focusing beyond the two of you prematurely is just plain stupidity.
Obviously in this case... the stupidity would belong to HIM.
:-)
Well, you know I'd be a lookin' for a new one!
I don't think you're selfish at all, by the way. And even if you are, fuck it!
See, this is why I like you all soo much!
Now if only one of you lived close by ...
My dad always told me that the best time to look for a job was when you already had one. I do believe the same applies to lovers.
XX
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